Strength and the Hermit, part 3: The Hermit and Boundaries
So, yeah: that path towards trusting myself and my abilities is definitely connected to the medicine of the Strength card… but also very much to the medicine of The Hermit. And, as I mentioned before, I’ve been deeply feeling the overlapping energies of these two cards and their respective signs, Leo and Virgo.
It actually just occurred to me that, simply by virtue of when I’ve had time this week for writing, that I have arrived here at part 3 of this series right during the cusp between Leo season and Virgo season. (I started writing it towards the start of the cusp, and am finishing it towards the end of the cusp). How appropriate!
PLUS, the transition between Leo and Virgo that happened on the 22nd is concurrent with a full moon, so I fully expect this Virgo season to be powerful. The full moon is an invitation to open ourselves to our intuition, emotions, insight, and intensity. The full moon also marks a time of fruition, in which we can close one cycle of the projects and areas of growth that we’ve been working on and move on to the next phase.
PLUS, this particular full moon was a seasonal blue moon. For those who don’t think about the moon as much as I do: a monthly blue moon is used to refer to the second full moon in a calendar month that has two full moons in it, while a seasonal blue moon is used to describe the third full moon in a season (i.e., the distance of time between an equinox and a solstice or between a solstice and an equinox) that has four full moons in it. Seasonal full moons are even more rare than monthly blue moons, so they are always worth taking note of. Seasonal blue moons invite us to pause, take note of the magic and preciousness around us, and harness our energy and focus for the path ahead.
PLUS, this is the second full moon in Aquarius that we’re having in 2021. As a result, it beckons us to amplify and bring to fruition the medicine that was invited into our lives by the first full moon in Aquarius: expressing our authenticity, letting go of all that we no longer need, reclaiming our power and freedom, and liberating ourselves and others from anything that’s been holding us back. You may have already been aware of questions regarding these themes percolating within your awareness in recent weeks: I know I’ve heard many of my friends bringing this up! If so: dive into the question of how you can embody the gifts of the full moon in Aquarius!
(Side note: the aforementioned friends include my dear friend Ilya Parker of Decolonizing Fitness, who has made a transition from their other platforms and towards their Patreon. If you have been looking for ways to put some of your energy towards supporting the work of Black trans folks, please consider becoming one of their Patreon supporters!)
It is also easy for us to simply focus on the bright intensity of the full moon, but it is important that we not forget that the full moon takes place within a cycle: while the night of the full moon is a wonderful time for illumination, it is of course followed by nights that get progressively darker until the night of the next new moon. As such, the full moon is a wonderful time to prepare ourselves for this journey into the darkness, into the deep innermost knowing within ourselves that is not dependent upon external sources of light or knowledge. The full moon is also a perfect time to take stock of what is most important to us as we move into the future, and to begin shedding anything that doesn’t, in the words of Lindsey Mack, promote “greater alignment with your soul’s highest and best.”
So, basically, a full moon that is concurrent with the transition from Leo/Strength season into Virgo/Hermit season that is also a seasonal blue moon and the second full moon in Aquarius of the year is not here to fuck around. My guess is that anyone and everyone who is on an intentional path of healing is going to be given many opportunities to close cycles that need to be closed and become more discerning about where they direct their time and energy.
Again, I’ve really been feeling this transition into Virgo/Hermit season building up. To be fair, the Hermit is one of the cards that I feel a DEEP connection to, and I’ve been doing some very intense work with the medicine of the Hermit card for a few months now… but I’ve really felt it coming to a head these last few weeks.
(Quick note: I would be remiss to not give continuing gratitude and credit to Lindsay Mack of Tarot for the Wild Soul for their powerful messages regarding the medicine within the cards of the tarot!)
On the left: the Hermit card from MJ Cullinane’s Crow Tarot Deck. On the right: the Hermit card from Chase Voorhees’ Tarot of the Holy Spectrum Deck.
I wrote a bit about the medicine offered by the Hermit card in part 1 of this series, which is worth quoting here:
“The Hermit invites us to free ourselves from dogma and from all influences that would try to pull us away from ourselves and our deepest truth. The Hermit trusts their own direct experience, while simultaneously knowing that spiritual awakening is a path, not a destination. The medicine within this card invites us to trust the rhythm of transitions, to maintain an intimate connection to our center in the midst of a world that can try to pull us in so many directions.
“The Hermit invites us to do all of these things not so that we can remain in a cave, isolated from the rest of existence. In fact, I think it is telling that most decks portray the Hermit walking out in the world. The Hermit’s lesson is rather to be:
so free within ourselves,
so trusting of the deep well of wisdom,
so willing to question everything, to be curious, and to be present with the state of not knowing,
so willing remain on our path regardless of the ways the world may be tempting us to go astray,
so willing to take our time with our process, or even to stop completely for a bit,
and so empowered in our own company that we are not tormented by dependence and fear
that we are able to move through the world as a force of compassion and service.”
The energies of the full moon, the transition into Virgo season, and the medicine of the Hermit have inspired me to make several changes and set some new boundaries, and I strongly feel that more will be unfolding into the future. Here are a few of the ways that I have taken steps to honor the energy of this time:
Setting boundaries with my emailing.
I set an auto-reply to both of my work emails, and also updated my email signature, with the goal being to establish boundaries that will enable me to take longer times away from my computer.
My new auto-reply says:
“Thank you for your message!
I love my work, and look forward to connecting with you. I also love many of the people and activities in my life that aren't connected to either work or email. As such, I sometimes set my phone down, step away from the computer, and enjoy time away from screens. Sometimes, this means a delay in my email responses from a few hours to a couple of days. But don't worry: I always return, and will reply to your email as soon as I do!
Let's all work together to challenge the paradigm of productivity at the expense of balance!
Thank you, and take care,
Lore McSpadden-Walker (they/them)”
My new email signature says:
“Take care,
Lore McSpadden-Walker (they/them)
I choose to work flexibly & send emails outside normal office hours: there's no need to respond to my emails outside yours. Let's all challenge the paradigm of prioritizing productivity over balance!”
I’m not naïve: I know that many people expect that others will instantaneously (or near-instantaneously) read and reply to their emails. I also know that when I stepped away without having an auto-reply set that I felt more guilt about being away from my emails than I would like to admit.
I also know that when I feel the pressure to be constantly accessible to people through email, it weighs on me.
That’s why I chose to clearly delineate my boundaries clearly in my auto-reply, and to acknowledge in my signature that I invite all those to whom I send emails to have and maintain their own boundaries when it comes to the time they take to reply to me.
I’m continuing to think of other ways to engage in business and social connections online while also maintaining the gentler pace through life (including having periods of time when I’m completely unplugged) that I prefer. I suspect that the auto-reply and signature are going to prove to be only the first steps in a process towards intentionally creating more time for my own creative processes, family, and community and for being more proactive about allowing myself (rather than societal expectations and social pressure) to be the one who determines the degree to which I am accessible.
As my wife Christine and I regularly say to our students, son, and each other: Consent is mandatory.
Focusing my work efforts so that all things are pointed in the direction of healing.
Christine and I have been talking a lot about the mission and vision of our business, and have changed them significantly. We have reached a point in our lives and our spiritual practices where we want all aspects of our lives to be consistent with our values and the trajectory of our growth and healing processes, and while that is not limited to the work we do through Positive Force Movement, LLC and its three divisions (The Positive Force Movement, Fat Folks Can, and The Wild Within Healing), it certainly includes them.
Our previous mission and vision statement was:
The mission of Positive Force Movement is to make elite, top-level coaching and wellness services available to people who have historically not felt welcomed by the fitness industry in a way that honors the full selves and identities of all who seek our services; our vision is to build a world in which all people who have experienced systemic marginalization have the opportunity to develop a joyful, playful, and empowering relationship to movement in a way that honors the holistic needs of each person.
Our new one is:
The mission of Positive Force Movement is to provide educational and empowerment-related services to people who have historically faced systemic marginalization, and to do so in a way that honors the full selves and identities of all who seek our services; our vision is a world in which all people have the opportunity to develop a joyful, playful, and present relationship to their embodied selves in a way that honors the holistic needs of each person.
The new one is obviously more expansive, in that it makes space for the work done by Christine through Fat Folks Can and by me through The Wild Within Healing. It is also more authentic to our values and spiritual paths, in that we removed the references to coaching, wellness, and fitness and instead put the focus on education and empowerment. This means that the ways we are coaching are changing, and that even the movement-related work that we do is centered on learning and healing, rather than on outcomes and programming; in other words, even in the gym, the movement is not the point, it is only the catalyst for the development of a deeper connection to our embodied experience of this world.
One result is that I am coaching less, and that I am being more discerning about who I take on as new students. If the movement coaching someone is looking for is outside of what I offer, I will gladly connect them to another coach.
The refocusing of our work is what made space for the additional projects I’m doing through The Wild Within Healing (stay tuned for part 4 of this blog series!), for my ability to pursue my MS in Mental Health Counseling, and for my ability to spend more time puttering around the garden and kitchen.
I could go on and on about the things that are shifting as I consider where my boundaries are versus where I need them to be for my highest and best to be possible, but all of the examples would obviously be more relevant to me than to you.
What I will do instead is invite you to consider the lessons, medicine, and offerings of the recent full moon, the transition into Virgo season, and the Hermit card. Are there things that they are inviting you to change, let go of, or grow towards? What might an authentic path forward for you look like? What is the first step in that direction?
I don’t know the answers. You may not, either. But the questions are here for you like wrapped gifts, waiting for you to gently, lovingly open them to discover what waits within them… and within you.
